When pursuing domestic infant adoption, it is not unusual for your
child to be born in a different state than the one in which you live.
Therefore, oftentimes adoptive parents find themselves traveling
out-of-state to bring home their bundle of joy. As an adoption
consultant, I get many questions about what adoptive parents should
bring on their out-of-state journey and what items really aren’t
necessary. Here are some key tips to help with your packing.
Pack to Stay for Awhile
The first thing you need to know when you are packing for
adopting a baby out-of-state is that you will be staying there for a
while. You will not be heading straight home after gaining custody of
the baby at the hospital. There are many legal maneuverings with
interstate adoption and one of them is the ICPC (Interstate Compact for
the Placement of Children). The ICPC involves paperwork that needs to be
completed and filed with both the state in which the baby is born and
your home state. Only after both states approve it are you legally
allowed to take the baby home. This usually occurs sometime between 2
and 15 business days after the baby is discharged from the hospital.
Comfort First
When you are packing for picking up baby, you want to put
comfort first for everyone. If it’s important to you, pack nice outfits
for the precious memories you are going to photograph when you first
meet the baby and/or when you leave the hospital. Besides that, focus on
comfort. Sweatpants, yoga pants and comfy t-shirts are all you are
going to want to wear as you adjust to your baby’s schedule and try to
catch some sleep whenever you can.
Of course, you also want to think of your baby’s comfort.
Since you will be spending some time in temporary housing (a hotel
room, a friend’s home or an AirBnB), you want your baby to have the same
comforts he or she would have at home. Pack a swaddle blanket that is
soft yet breathable. You can also consider a bassinet or foldable Pack
‘n Play but check first if your hotel has one to rent or if your AirBnB
host has one available. It is also sweet to bring a special newborn-safe
stuffed animal for your baby to cuddle with.
Lastly, since you will be staying for a while, choose
accommodations that have plenty of space and convenience. For instance,
select a suite with a kitchenette including a microwave, sink, and
refrigerator. Also consider a unit with a living room area so you and
your partner can take turns caring for the baby at night in a separate
space while the other one rests. AirBnB or HomeAway are great options
that can provide you with plenty of space for less cost than a hotel
room. If you explain your situation to the host, they’re often willing
to be flexible with your unknown arrival and departure dates.
Baby Essentials
Since you won’t be bringing your baby directly home, you
need to pack the baby essentials to care for your newborn while you are
away. Of course the first thing you need is a car seat as no hospital
will allow you to leave with the baby without one. You can either pack
it and take it with you, buy one at your destination, or pre-order from a
national chain and pick it up at your destination. Some other
essentials that you will need include:
Baby bottles (you should hold off on formula until you know which brand the hospital is using)
Baby clothes (a few onesies and t-shirts will do)
Laundry detergent for babies or for sensitive skin
Blankets (soft swaddlers)
Diapers and wipes
Disposable trash bags for diapers
Changing pad
Diaper bag
Pacifiers (even if you don’t intend to use them, they’re good to have on hand as you never know if you might change your mind)
Burp clothes and washcloths
Bottle dish soap and drying rack
Stroller (this isn’t absolutely necessary but you’re
going to want to go out rather than stay in a hotel room all the time. I
suggest a lightweight foldable stroller frame into which you can just
snap the car seat.)
Paperwork Organization
It is very important that you bring all relevant adoption
paperwork with you and keep it organized. If you are traveling by
plane, keep your paperwork with you in your carry-on so there is no risk
of it being lost. It is also a good idea to make extra copies of
important documents and to store digital versions in the cloud for easy
access in case anything happens to your hard copies.
Adopting a baby from another state can seem overwhelming
but being open to that option can be what leads you to your baby. With a
little preparation, some savvy packing, and a healthy dose of patience,
the out-of-state travel can go very smoothly. Once you’re back home,
the hassle of traveling will quickly become a distant memory as you
focus on the joy of life with your new child.
Written by Nicole Witt, owner of The Adoption Consultancy (www.TheAdoptionConsultancy.com),
an unbiased resource serving pre-adoptive families by providing them
with the education, information and guidance they need to safely adopt a
newborn, usually within three to 12 months.
